Have you ever noticed that the only people who want Black women to stop having standards or “lower their standards” are Black male losers, Black women who are obsessed with the idea of “saving the Black race (in America)” by using other Black women as sacrificial lambs, and racists who wish us all ill anyway? If you haven’t, you either don’t get out much or you have never read a relationship/dating blog geared toward BW.
The number one thing that the aforementioned types of people want BW to know is that their standards are too high, which is an obvious lie. If anything the opposite is true. Women with high standards would not put up with losers and bums “hollering” at them on public streets. They’d report them to the police. Women with high standards would not settle for being a baby mama instead of a wife and mother. Women with high standards would not associate with men they know are dangerous to them and those around them, because they pity them for being born Black and male and believe (foolishly) that it’s harder than being Black and female. 😆 It still amazes me that there are women out there who believe this, when it should be quite obvious that it’s not remotely true.
I am also shocked by the large number of BW willing to lower their standards to appease people that want to use, abuse, slander and blame them for anything and everything. My father gave me a piece of advice that fits this subject well: “Never take advice from someone who hates you or envies you.” And I would add to that statement, Never take advice from someone who sees you as a threat to their status.
This would seem common sense, but many Black women are taking advice from men who want them to be easy sex and/or compliant to the will of insecure men, and women who want them to wear their hair super short or be overweight so that they are less sexually alluring to the men that they may want for themselves. Such people, regardless of ethnicity, are enemies and their advice should be ignored.
Here’s the thing about standards, without them it’s like you’re sitting in a canoe, in the middle of the ocean, without a compass or a paddle. Without standards, you cannot set goals for how you want your life to turn out nor create a plan for reaching them. Without standards you are likely to put up with anything from anyone.
For many people, most people in fact, standards symbolize self-respect and are used to (accurately) measure your sense of self-worth. This is why certain people feel deeply threatened by Black women who have high standards. It shows that they respect themselves and understand their own worth, and they behave accordingly. You cannot run mind games on such a woman. You can’t convince her to allow parasites to feed off of her. You can’t convince her that it’s her duty to give ex-cons “a chance”.
Over the years, there have been many newsworthy cases of Black women who put themselves (and their loved ones) in harms way, by not setting standards for those that they allowed into their lives. I’m sure you can all name at least two incidents. People who lack standards or have low standards should be avoided. It can be very dangerous to keep company with such people.
Trust me, if your standards really are “too high”, time and your own life experience will bare that out. You do not require the self-serving advice of a peanut gallery with (likely) malicious intent. Remember, anyone who is trying to convince you that you should be less and want less is questionable, at best. Ignore them.