To all the heterosexual Black women who love to shout to the whole world that they don’t need a man: Please, stop lying!
Seriously, if you are a heterosexual woman who wants to have a romantic relationship with another Human being, that Human being will have to be a MAN. Therefore, just be honest with yourself and others. Or at least be wise enough to keep your mouth shut. Because unless you’re planning to join a convent and/or take a vow of lifelong celibacy and avoid the company of men, what is the point of pretending that you have no use for the male of the species?
As a heterosexual woman you MUST have some use for men. If not, you are not, by definition, heterosexual. Heterosexual women need men just as much as heterosexual men need women. To say otherwise, is just plain dishonest and laughable. Have you ever heard a heterosexual man say “I don’t need a woman!”? I haven’t.
Does this mean I am encouraging Black women to act desperate or be needy? No, of course not! But pretending that you don’t have the same natural Human need for male companionship and love that every other heterosexual woman has accomplishes nothing, and may even backfire.
Every woman I have ever known who said those words is (seemingly) incapable of sustaining a relationship with a man. And I suspect it’s a case of their manifesting what they’ve put out into the universe. The Secret isn’t really a secret, and it’s really real. There’s a principle of quantum physics that states, “You attract what you focus on”. According to this principle, focusing actually causes changes in energy fields that automatically produce a physical change in your surroundings. I know this is true, because I have witnessed and experienced this effect.
There’s a reason why people – men and women, Black and White – tend to create what they fear most, while attempting to prevent what they fear from occurring. I’m sure some of you have witnessed or experienced this as well. So, what is a woman to do? Focus on solutions and outcomes. What do you want? Once you are honest with yourself about that, you are one step closer to getting what you truly want.
Despite what you may have been led to believe by the media, the feminist movement, or even your own single mother, there is nothing wrong or shameful about wanting an honest, decent, trustworthy man in your life; it would be peculiar if you did not.
And to those who flat out refuse to understand what I am saying: Yes, you do have a right to your opinions and feelings, Freedom of Speech, Freedom of Expression, … blah blah blah, whatever. That doesn’t make focusing on the negative feelings you have about men and relationships the smart thing to do. It certainly doesn’t make it the productive thing to do. Ask yourself these questions: How is my negative focus working for me? Am I any happier or content as a result?
These are questions only you can answer.